Nursing is a dynamic, ever growing, thriving profession that is a vital part of maintaining the health of humanity. As nurses, we are on the front lines fighting for the health and well being of our patients and loved ones. While nursing is a profession, it is also so much more–it is a way of life.
On my first day of nursing school, my professor announced to the class that once we became nurses, we would always be nurses. There would never be an option to turn back. “Like the mafia!”, she joked. This comment never left me–and I soon found out that she was right. Once I was indoctrinated into the field of nursing, I knew I would never again look at people on the subway or at the grocery store with the same type of indifference and lack of intuitive understanding again.
Four years of school later, and I no longer see swollen feet, varicose veins, limps, bulging eyes, or a stammer the same way. I see potential CHF, an injury from tripping down the unsafe stairs, hyperthyroidism, anxiety or a speech disorder, and all the difficulties that come with. My heart immediately goes out to them for all the parts of their experience that I understand, and so much more that I never, ever will.
We are so blessed with this ability to see what much of the population is blind to. We see the struggle and difficulty of those around us. We use this gift to protect and advocate for the health, safety, and well being of others–from the moment we open our eyes in the morning to the moment we close them at night. Our friends, parents, sons, daughters, patients, spouses rely on us to care for them selflessly. Every waking moment we live and breathe nursing, whether we are “at work” or not. Our work is filled with love, care, and meaning.
If our job is so meaningful and vitally important to the well being of society, shouldn’t we all be happy and proud of the things we accomplish on a daily basis? Shouldn’t we feel a deep sense of pride and love for ourselves and our work? Unfortunately, rather than feel this fulfillment and gratitude for the blessings our work provides ourselves and others, we are exhausted, stressed, frustrated, unhappy and unhealthy.
Why aren’t we happy, healthy nurses?
So, why then is it so hard to be a happy nurse? Why is it so hard to be a healthy nurse? I emphasize the healthy over the happy because we cannot be happy without first being healthy. We need our strength, energy, exercise, good food, and moments of peace if we are to care for our patients the way we should be caring for ourselves. But in the same vein, we cannot truly be healthy if we are not happy. We need to spend time just relaxing with our hobbies and loved ones. Anything that brings us joy has the potential to contribute to our happiness–and therefore, healthiness.
But again, why is it so hard to be a happy, healthy nurse? Following the logic that doing what we love should bring us happiness, all of us passionate nurses should be exuding joy on a daily basis! We get to save lives and heal the sick for god’s sake! Obviously, however, happiness is much more complex than this (but more simple than one may think).
So many of us are overtired, overworked, burnt out, in physical pain, or just plain spent. We spend our professional lives, and much of our personal lives, caring for others at the expense of our own well being. As professionals who hold and transfer hundreds of pounds during patient care, who spend twelve hours at a time on our feet, who nearly break our own backs caring for those who cannot care for themselves, as nurses, we are incredibly strong. However, even the strong need to be cared for. Everybody needs to be cared for in some capacity. If we don’t care for ourselves, somebody else will be saddled with that job down the road.
The Importance of Caring for the Self
As a young adult nearing her twenties, I had assumed that by the time I started college I would not only be fully capable of caring for someone, but a master at it. However, I found that during my first few years of nursing school, and then as a professional nurse working in home-care, I was literally learning how to care for someone. I was learning to take effective actions to better the health of my patients instead of just talking about it. Actually turn down the lights to improve relaxation. Actually take a walk when I needed a break.
This realization was alarming to me because I had assumed that at 20 years old, I had already mastered the basics of care in general. Brush your hair, teeth, shower often, wear clean clothes, sleep 8 hours, eat healthy foods. But what I found was that although I knew that these things were important, I wasn’t practicing healthy habits. I knew what I should be doing, I just wasn’t actually doing it.
(As a quick aside: Just like many driven individuals (many of whom make up our profession), I am a “perfectionist”–someone who isn’t satisfied with something until it’s perfect. I was unwilling to integrate healthy habits into my life unless I could do it perfectly. News flash: THAT’S NOT POSSIBLE.
I tried to get 8 hours of sleep, and still only got 7. I tried to run for half an hour, and got discouraged when I couldn’t keep up a jog all the way up the hill next to my house. I tried to eat only (what I perceived to be) “healthy” foods, and quit as soon as I realized that at the end of the day I was craving something more substantial than a garden salad and an apple. I never even started many, many projects (like this blog) for fear of never being perfect.)
I wouldn’t implement these imperfect yet beneficial habits (sleeping enough, eating healthy, exercising, etc) in my own life, but I would do my damned hardest to implement them in the lives of my patients. If they couldn’t get 7 hours, they got 6. If they couldn’t walk around the block, they would walk up their hallway. And you know what? I was shocked to find that these imperfect habits benefited them almost as much as if they had practiced them “perfectly”. Rather than just drop the ball and say “screw it!” when it wasn’t done exactly right, I worked with my patients to complete the tasks set ahead for them the best way they knew how. And their health improved dramatically.
I started adopting this mindset and applying it to my personal life: If I don’t have enough energy to take a shower and scrub my whole body, I simply get in and wash my hair/brush my teeth. If I can’t bring myself to complete an assignment tonight I allow myself to just brainstorm and take notes so that when I sit down to do it tomorrow, it’s that much easier.
Applying this concept, among others to my life has improved my health state dramatically. I am sleeping more, reading more, spending more time with friends, family, my pets, and even by myself. I feel more whole, accepting of myself, happy, and healthy than I have in years. And I know this is just the beginning of my personal journey to wellness.
I decided to create this blog to document my journey to becoming a happy, healthy nurse. I am an average 22 year old woman, starting out on my own in the world. I am still learning things like “how to make a car payment”, “how to pay your student loans”, and evidently, how to care for myself.
But I know one thing for sure: I want to enjoy my life–not struggle through it. I also know that I enjoy my life most when I am loved and cared for. Especially, when I am loved and cared for by myself.
I know that I, and thousands of other nurses alike, struggle with self-care. It’s nothing we haven’t heard or thought to ourselves before–self-care feels selfish, as though we’re taking caring energy away from our patients and families. However, this mentality is incorrect and damaging. We, as nurses, are as strong as the strongest come. But even the strong need to be cared for. We can, and will, care for ourselves–just as well as we care for our friends, families, patients, and each other. We are nurses, we are strong, and we can do this.
Happy Healthy Nursing 